Jusrecht (jusrecht) wrote,
Jusrecht
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Drabble: Schneizel/Clovis (saying goodbye)

Touch the Sun
Request: Schneizel/Clovis, by ladyassassin27; prompt: saying goodbye
Rating: PG
Warning: Vague-ness, bad reference to Greek mythology
Word Count: 854

Notes: I think I fail.

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Sometimes Clovis looked at his two eldest brothers and thought of stars.

He was always a romantic sort of person, although one could arguably said that there was nothing romantic about the comparison. In fact, it was almost sad, if not pitiable.

The truth was, it wasn’t that Odysseus was stupid or incompetent by any means. It was just Schneizel outshone him, so utterly and completely that his metaphors about stars and how they lost their luster in the sun’s presence fell squarely into place. They were there, shining as brightly as they could. You just didn’t see them.

And sometimes, it led him to wonder what he was.

A third son was about as unimportant as the next – his father had made it clear. He prided himself as an excellent artist, but there were evidently better qualities for someone of his station. Like Cornelia who was so good at piloting that she could put all their knights to shame. Or Schneizel.

Clovis allowed himself a long, despondent sigh at the thought of his second brother. There was something to be said about Prince Schneizel el Britannia and why everyone seemed to be a little in love with him. Being brothers – or half-brothers in that matter – did not seem to exclude him from this affliction. Clovis found himself falling to the same pit everyone else had, a real sad case now that he thought of it.

It was a quiet breakfast he was currently having – just the three of them, the eldest princes, because the Emperor didn’t even bother to spend the morning together before one of his sons was due to leave. The conversation was kept on light matters – from general politics to the most recent play they had seen – but Clovis could only manage the most perfunctory remarks for every question thrown his way. Not that he cared much. There was only the thought of leaving and being separated, and suddenly he discovered that he couldn’t look away from his brother’s face.

It had always been the face that he saw within the enclosed space of his mind, the only face that he had ever sought after since his father had brushed him off a long time ago. In that pastel-coloured world of his childhood, he had been six and his eleven-year-old brother had seemed so strong and mature, and his caresses had been so very gentle as the younger prince cried on his chest. The memory had continued to stay with him throughout his adolescent, and then adult life.

And so had the fascination.

They said first love stayed with you forever. Clovis shivered at the thought. He couldn’t imagine how he was going to endure the rest of his life with this fervent longing burning inside his chest. Hoping that it would eventually die away had proven to be futile in the last eighteen years. If anything, it had only grown – now speckled with lust if nothing else. Turning to other men and women had not yielded a better result either and he was running out of possible options in the menu.

His chest tightened when they had finished breakfast - the time of his departure drew closer. Odysseus apologized for not being able to see him off and left the parlour in a hurry, leaving his two younger brothers in their own company. Schneizel, his superior both in knowledge and station, made a few observations about his duty as a new governor-general as they walked down corridor after corridor. Clovis was content to listen, painfully aware that he wouldn’t be able to hear his brother’s deep, soothing voice in such close proximity for quite a long time.

The end of their journey came much too soon and they had stood just before the main entrance of the palace before he was aware of it. Clovis looked up, wishing that he could say something to ease the sting of farewell, but as always, his eloquence died in front of his second brother. Schneizel remained a picture of calmness, even when he stepped closer and raised a gloved hand to cup his face.

Clovis felt his heart stop.

“Good luck,” Schneizel said and brushed his lips on the younger prince’s right cheek, not close enough to make a firm contact with his mouth but much too close to be considered a chaste kiss. It ended in an instant and when he pulled away, followed not long after by his hand, he smiled at him and added, “I know you won’t disappoint me.”

Feet rooted to the floor, Clovis found himself trembling as his eyes followed his brother walking away from him. The sun and the stars. Then perhaps he was Icarus who was burned to ashes for trying to reach the sun.

Now he knew why he never cared much for mythology, despite his romantic nature. Clovis turned around, a purpose in his steps and a tremulous smile on his face. Once he had proven himself a worthy brother, perhaps then he would have the right to touch the sun.

It wouldn’t be easy, but at least he had plenty of time.

End
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Tags: !drabbles, fandom: code geass, pairing: others
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